I realised that I'm the type of person who's easily influenced. My thoughts, actions, decisions can vary in different situations and hence, I'm just not the type of person who's grounded to one's beliefs and values. (I dont even think i have specific beliefs/values hah what nonsense) & all these cause me to be easily worked up.

You see, i'm the middle child. Not so significant in any way but i'm like the middle process. My older brudder is like the appetizer, Minin's the dessert. So what's left? The main course - me. My parents expect so much of me, w/o realising it. Or is it just me, trying to mend the broken pieces of my parents' hearts. The heartbreaks caused by my ever troublemaker older brother. When the appetizer's bad, it takes a delicious main course to make the whole meal better isnt it?

Lately, perhaps due to the hols, I've been assailed by negative thoughts abt sch. You see, there are quite a number of minus points abt schooling in vj right now. My mind has been drifting to the "take the easy route" mindset. But, dont they say, what doesnt kill you just make you stronger? I cant waste my parents' money, i cant lead them into another phase of failed jc/poly life. I cant repeat my brother's mistakes.

So i hope this motivation(=my brother's failures)will last long and keep me strong. Come Term 2.